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My Ass is Not a Conversation Starter

12/22/2016

4 Comments

 
Picture
I know.  Jesus, is she about to rant again?  

YES.  

When folks, women included, stop saying moronic shit like "those leggings make your ass look fat" or "did you dress like that for me, baby", then I can stop ranting about 30 percent of shit.

Here's the deal, especially for the gentlemen, telling me that I have a fat ass is not a conversation starter.  It is why assholes like me and anti socials tend to wear headphones even when the music is not playing.  I have to find a way to curve this nervous tick to not smile and demonstrate the mechanics of how high I can wave up my middle finger.  Times like these make it painfully hard for me to not call you something profane but...if the shoe fits, it doesn't mean you have to actually wear it.  Maybe you can pick it up and put it back down because it's not your style.  
​
Please whisper sweet nothings in my air like "You don't know how to take a compliment."  Follow up with another bullshit line insulting my misdiagnosed insecurities because you have a Ph.D in insult master, been certified with the National Bitch Slayer Association.  Sure, I'm just another emotional, overly sensitive woman and I should grow some "balls" but you are still an asshole.  

Let me tell you why:
  1. In elementary school, we learned about common courtesy and respect for our fellow peers.  I take it as you thought the Sesame Street and Barney songs don't translate into adulthood.
  2. There's a serious difference between a compliment and you being a jerk.  Approaching a stranger and telling them that their ass makes your penis jump or your vagina feel like the Niagara is fucking atrocious.  Telling me that you think that I'm beautiful or a simple hello is okay by ME.  Even with you saying this with the utmost respect, some folks may still be bothered that you're interrupting them.  Unfortunately, this person may have received one too many pervy comments and assumed you are not doing anything different.  Does it make it right?  Absolutely not.  BUT, get this:  At least you know that you did nothing wrong in this situation.
  3. if a person rejects you politely, don't try to antagonize them because your primitive emotions wanted to vomit out of your mouth.  You sir or madam, look bitter as hell.
  4. Every approach isn't for everyone.  What may work for one, may not work for all.  Be mindful or maybe, just avoid saying something altogether.
  5. When in doubt, WWMD?  Oh, you don't know what this means:  What would MOTHER do?  Better yet  WWYD if your mother or father was told something similar to what you may have said to a complete stranger?  
  6. I'm not one to call folks misogynist every five minutes, even though there's times where some of you folks can breakdance with the devil to say what you feel but know that your actions and words have consequences.  Sticks and stones may break your bones and guess what... Words hurt can permanently scar many.  Think before you act or speak.  We don't know what trigger folks these days.
  7. Women (and men) want to be treated like a human, not a sex object or muse.  Well, even if you happen to like that type of thing, there's a time and place for it.  A person going for a jog most likely isn't looking to be harassed because of their attire.
  8. Regardless of what a person wears, NOBODY is ever "asking for it."  That's just gross as fuck bro.  Let's not cosign harassment.  
  9. Sometimes, you may not have done something wrong in your head and just maybe, you are ignorant about what may offend others, particularly someone of the opposite sex.  Have an open discussion with friends and family about the topic.  Hell, too shy?  Google is actually infinite.  A bit of caution that the Internet or people's words and testaments are OPINIONS.  Regardless, let this serve as a guide in a sense to be open and mindful.

So, how does all of this tie into running?  You might be saying that this is a blog about running.  Well, some women in my running community experience this sort of harassment on regular basis.  As a Brooklyn girl, I experience this at least twice a week.  I'm not the most curvaceous person who ever graced this earth but I definitely experience it.  Some days, I refrain from saying a word, never moving my head anywhere and keep my eyes locked into a forward gaze as I pretend not to hear a word.  Some days, the comments are so grotesque that my angry translator goes off.  Seldom times, I have some guys who are bold enough to grab my arm to get my attention, which is a clear way to make me want to Chuck Norris roundhouse kick you to the face.

You know, not all of you are intending to be jerks and for this, perhaps I should apologize for name calling.  As a person living in America, I am very aware that cultural differences or different upbringing can shape who or what we react to as adults.  Thankfully, as mind numbing as reality television can be most times, there's real time discussions happening around the globe about respecting others' personal space.  It is no longer whispered.  Let the change begin with you. Whilst some of us may never respond to you if it's clear that you're hitting on us, not all of us runners will be a jerk about a respectable compliment.  
4 Comments
Lissy
12/23/2016 15:52:55

I love u!!!!!!!!! For me u are beautiful as u are!!!

Reply
Matanel Moses Levi
5/26/2019 18:04:04

What a goddess beautiful sexy girl 😍😍😍 I love from the heart

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